“Do You Eat at McDonald’s?”
What good am I if I’m like all the rest,
If I just turned away, when I see how you’re dressed,
If I shut myself off so I can’t hear you cry,
What good am I?— Bob Dylan, ”What Good Am I?”
In one of my earliest posts last February, Dylan’s probing question led me to confess that I lacked a good personal response to the homeless people I meet every day on the streets of Berkeley.
I’m not sure I’ve formulated any better answers after a year, but I have tried to be more helpful, more bold, more compassionate. Most of the time, though, I fall far short of anything remotely resembling loving generosity.
One suggestion that Kevin offered at the time was that I should keep a few fast food gift certificates in my pocket so I could offer something tangible to someone who said they needed a meal.
That’s a suggestion that I never acted on. Until yesterday, that is.
Well, sort of.
As I was walking to grab some lunch, I was not surprised to be approached by a homeless person. But this bedraggled older man started things off a bit unexpectedly:
“Do you eat at McDonald’s?” he asked.
“Um, not usually,” I replied. “Why do you ask?”
He thrust a set of McDonald’s gift certificates towards me. I thought that perhaps he was afraid to go into the store to redeem them. I’ve known other homeless folks who’ve been treated pretty shabbily by local restaurants, so I could understand why that might be the case. So I asked him if he’d like me to go into McDonald’s to buy him some lunch.
He answered quickly, as if he feared that any pause in his speech would give me an opportunity to exit stage right: “No, sir. I was actually hoping that you’d buy these certificates from me. I don’t like McDonald’s, so I don’t have much use for these. What I’d really like is to get me a big ol’ chili dog.”
As much as I hate to admit it, all the old suspicions tumbled back into my head.... Someone gave him these certificates as a gift, isn’t he being ungrateful? What if he wants to use the money for whatever his destructive habit of choice might be? Why isn’t McDonald’s good enough for someone who’s hungry?
Shameful, really.
The thing is, I don’t like McDonald’s either. How could I fault him for sharing my distaste? And while I’ve certainly known people whose lives were ripped apart by alcohol or crack, what did it say about me that I assumed something similar about the life of this man? Was I willing to make such a dignity-robbing assumption just because he was poor and black?
Hell, maybe the dude just wanted a chili dog.
If I wasn’t pounding away at a deadline at work, maybe I would have bought him that chili dog. Maybe I would have sat and eaten lunch with him. Maybe I would have learned something from him. Even if it was only his name.
Waiter, do you have a table for two dim reflections of the imago dei?
In the end, I bought the certificates from him and gave him a buck or two extra. I wished him well and sent him off to his chili dog or who-the-hell-knows-what-else with a smile.
I guess it was the least I could do.
And now I’ve got some McDonald’s gift certificates to give to the next person who tells me that he’s hungry.
7 Ripples from ““Do You Eat at McDonald’s?””
Jim says:
February 15, 2006 at 6:02 am
By calling those thoughts that tumbled into your head at the man’s request “shameful” you are telling a story on all of us because we all have them. After so many years encountering this it hasn’t changed, at least for me. And most of the time I give the people something.
I also know from conversations that many of those who come asking think in assumptions about us as well.
I think it’s our actions that matter in the face of those questions that taunt us. Yours seems like a pretty good one.
timmer k. says:
February 15, 2006 at 8:02 am
I think everyone who lives/works in a major metropolitan area faces the challenge of that situation often. Most the time I feel like Cronk fom “The Emperors New Groove,” paying more attention to the angel and demon on my right and left shoulders than to the imago dei by the roadside.
I’ve long looked for an easy solution to these situations. I’m coming to realize that, if there were such a solution, it would have been discovered and implemented long ago. So, until such time as a permanent solution arises, I pray that I too will have the courage to send that person away with a smile--it may be the best gift I can give.
kim says:
February 16, 2006 at 6:02 pm
To be honest, I don’t blame the guy - McDonald’s food is greasy and full of nutritionally empty calories. I used to struggle with this issue myself when I lived in urban areas - sometimes I bought the homeless newspaper or gave cash, once I bought a woman groceries, and after awhile I stopped giving out money and just donated to food pantries and other programs that would provide services to the homeless. But I was never sure if I was doing enough to treat panhandlers with dignity, to refuse their requests but still acknowledge their humanity, to see them as God’s children rather than just a blight on a neighborhood.
Jenny says:
February 19, 2006 at 3:02 pm
Like timmer k. said, this is an issue faced by anyone who lives or works in an urban area, and it’s tough. I definitely don’t blame the man you spoke with for not wanting to eat at McDonald’s—I don’t eat there, that’s for sure.
Over the past while my own thoughts about panhandlers/beggars come down to the question of choice. A person asks me for spare change on the street—spare change, not gift certificates or actual food. Who am I to tell him what he or she really needs, or what he or she should do with the money?
Maybe that’s a little too esoteric for this very corporeal matter, I don’t know.
LotharBot says:
February 20, 2006 at 2:02 am
Who am I to tell him what he or she really needs, or what he or she should do with the money?
Once you give a person money, it’s no longer yours, so once they have it you have no reason to tell them what to do with it (though there’s nothing wrong with giving advice.) But it’s your choice whether or not to give it in the first place—your choice whether or not you think that’s the best stewardship you can engage in. While we don’t necessarily know what’s best for each individual homeless person, that doesn’t let us off the hook—it’s still our responsibility to *try* to do the best we can with the resources we control.
Most of the advocates for the homeless I’ve talked to say it’s best to fund places like food banks, kitchens, shelters, etc. rather than just to put cash in a homeless person’s hand. Not just because “they’ll waste it on booze”, either—even those who will spend it sensibly on groceries don’t have the economy-of-scale factor that food banks etc. have. Maybe that’s not true for every homeless person, but it’s true for a lot of them.
On the original topic: if you give a homeless person 5 bucks in McDonalds gift certificates, they might get a couple pretty weak meals. The same 5 bucks, through your local food bank or shelter, will likely feed the same homeless person half a dozen fairly good meals. Or you can buy them groceries yourself and do just as well. I don’t spend my money on McDonalds because it’s a poor use of money, so why pre-spend money for a homeless person on that garbage?
rick says:
February 22, 2006 at 9:02 am
First, that Rick dude you mentioned truly is genius.
I once found a man rummaging through the trash at a Burger King. I asked if he was hungry and he said yes. We went inside and I allowed him to get whatever he wanted. You should have seen his eyes.
You post got me thinking, why would i feed someone something I wouln’t eat? It’s like giving away a coat that I won’t wear. You know Cecil Williams at Glide in SF? His policy is no used crap. There is somthing about dignity.
I don’t know if I am making sense, but just really wanted to say I appreciated this post… and mostly to say that I like that Rick guy from the Bay area.
Peace.
zalm says:
February 22, 2006 at 5:02 pm
Yeah, that Rick dude was pretty great, but there’s a Rick That’s Sorta from Philly who is growing on me.
I appreciate each of your responses. It’s comforting to know that there are people out there who also honestly wrestle with these questions.
I agree that giving money to shelters and soup kitchens is probably better stewardship. And we do.
But, like Kim shared, I still struggle with whether that gives me license to refuse an individual request, and if so, how I can do so in a way that doesn’t seem to fall profoundly short of the loving person I’m called to be.
I know that I don’t have the time or the resources or the skill to give true aid to every homeless person I pass. But the more I tell myself this as I pass by someone asking for help, the more I feel like I’m just looking for escape clauses in the call of Christ.
Then again, maybe this whole question is just a dodge. Maybe the answer isn’t to look for a one-size-fits-all response, but to do something crazy and actually try to love one person. And then maybe another.
Maybe one day I’ll actually have the courage to try that.
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