Down with G-O-D
Today was a shitty day.
Terrible? Check. Horrible? Yep, that too. No good? No question. Very bad? Very true.
Thank goodness there was help waiting for me when I got home.
One of the fringe benefits of being a Christian is that I’ve somehow been chosen to receive “The Crossings Chronicle,” a periodic update from “The Book Club for Today’s Christian Family.” And this issue was just chock full of hope and joy.
Right on the cover, next to the smiling faces of Left Behind authors Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins, was the promise that by joining the book club, I could “Get closer to God” and “save big!” Honestly, I’m not sure which of those promises was supposed to excite me more.
But seeing as how part of today’s shittiness involved me finding out that my job was more or less disappearing, it’s probably time to cut back on my “getting closer to God” budget. So, suddenly finding myself in the market for a little discount holiness, I turned the page....
As I did so, I was greeted by the smiling face of Max Lucado. (Christians sure are a smiley bunch, aren’t they?) And it was like Max had chosen to speak directly to me, for the description of his latest book, Every Day Deserves a Chance, began thusly:
No more bad days — ever!
Wow! I sure would’ve saved myself a lot of pain with the ow! and the hurting if I’d picked this book up earlier. Like, anytime before today.
If you’ve ever had “one of those days” — and let’s face it, everybody has — then you need to read Max Lucado’s uplifting look at how any day, no matter how bad, can be turned into a good day.
Looks like this is going to be one of those “turn my frown upside down” kind of programs. So… what’s the magic ingredient, Max? Positive thinking? Rainbows? Puppies and ice cream?
The key is to connect with God.
And save big!
And if you think you’ve heard that phrase before, just take a new look at “G-O-D”: Grace, Oversight and Direction — three specific things that believers are blessed with through their relationship with Jesus Christ.
Okay, hold on a minute, Max. This God of which you speak… this is the same God whose name was so holy that the ancient Jews would not dare utter it, eschewing the tetragrammaton for the safer Adonai, right? Um, does Patrem omnipotentem ring any bells?
Because that’s the God whose name you just turned into a self-help pneumonic device to sell books and make me feel bad for feeling bad.
You know what? I think I’ll pass on the 99¢ spirituality.
I like to think that my God is quite a bit bigger than your effable PowerPoint potentate. Even if it means that getting closer sometimes comes at a great cost.
And even if it means that shitty days hurt as much as this one did.
12 Ripples from “Down with G-O-D”
Will says:
August 7, 2007 at 9:45 am
First of all, let me say that I am sorry about your shitty day. I’ve had more than a few of those myself lately, and I hope your tomorrow is much better. You will be in my thoughts and prayers tonight.
Second, I want to thank you for this post. I am often amazed at how so many people take the transcendence, omnipotence, and genuine otherness of God for granted. Yes, I am estastic that God is also immanent, that God’s incarnation in Jesus makes it easier for me to draw closer to him, and that his presence through the Holy Spirit is constant in my life. All this, however, does not negate the fact that there are times when God scares the Hell out of me.
Anyone who reads even a small portion of the Bible knows that the Divine is not to be taken lightly. As more than one of the divinely inspired authors of our scriptures says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.”
So whether it is some book peddling salesperson trying to pawn off his or her lastest self help tome of the week on the Christian masses by using God’s name in vain as a sales technique, or some of the more insipid praise choruses that are all about “me” and how God is little more than a warm fuzzy to wrap around my cold my feet, let me, in closing add, I have had enough of that crap.
Will says:
August 7, 2007 at 9:50 am
I hope you don’t mind my posting some of your stuff on my blog as well with a link back here. Also, I love the design of your blog. I’ve been meaning to say that for some time. One of my nicknames is fishdance, and your header perfectly captures it I think.
Jim says:
August 7, 2007 at 10:36 am
Zalm,
Yikes. You sure did bury the lede in this post. Your job? What the hell? You probably don’t want to write about it or you would have already which is fine, but I know what direction my prayers are going to take.
And I hope you put that Crossings Chronicle in the birdcage or litterbox where it can get the treatment it deserves.
and a BTW @ Will ... dude, your URL has a comma where a period should be.
Will says:
August 7, 2007 at 11:08 am
Sorry to take up space on your blog, Zalm, but James was right (he’d like to think that is always the case, and I let him maintain that little self-deception most of the time). I have corrected my url attached to my name.
Jim says:
August 7, 2007 at 4:52 pm
I’m not always right. I’m right precisely when I mean to be.
zalm says:
August 7, 2007 at 11:05 pm
Thanks, guys.
I’m clearly not the first to tell you this, but you’re right, Jim. The real nugget of pain hidden in that flaky crust of bitter snarkitude was the part where I discovered on Monday that the small company I work for will be shutting down sometime in the next month or so.
I don’t really know what this all means for us yet, especially since we might be looking at a move to an unknown destination sometime in the not-too-distant but still very unknown future.
So while I know very little about the future, I do know a lot about the present. Let’s just say that I’m not a big fan.
Gale says:
August 15, 2007 at 10:24 am
I just don’t understand Christians using that kind of language! There are better words to describe really bad days.
Are you Baptist?
Will says:
August 15, 2007 at 11:10 am
Yes, sometimes even Christians need to call things exactly as they see them. A shitty day is a shitty day, period. Of course Zalm could have used “crappy.” but even that would have offended some. I have had a taste of people being offended by my rather tame language recently, and all I can do about is shrug my shoulders and sigh. If you want to read about this, you can look at this post on my blog and its followup.
http://www.onethingiknow.net/2007/08/12/on-using-the-s-word/
http://www.onethingiknow.net/2007/08/15/more-on-offensive-language/
On a personal note to Zalm:
I don’t mean to hijack your blog, so if you’d prefer you can delete this comment.
I also hope things are better for you this week. You are still in my prayers.
dutchgirl says:
August 26, 2007 at 1:10 pm
oooh, oooh...i’m guessing united methodist.
did i win?
Brandon says:
August 30, 2007 at 5:21 am
Gale,
Fuck off.
Zalm,
I’m sorry not to have been around for a while. I do hope things have been falling into place in the last three weeks. I certainly can’t yet claim to know the way the Lord works, but I suppose I have faith that God does. And, when God blesses a person with as much talent as you, I find it difficult to believe that there aren’t a host of folks who’d love to have you on their side.
All that to doesn’t go to say that I think you should be happy, or content, or even quiet about your disappointment. It’s just to say that I have faith in your worth and future success--even when it’s hard for you to have it.
peace,
bv
Jim says:
October 1, 2007 at 2:03 am
Brandon,
I’m shocked. SHOCKED!
You must be Methodist.
Trent says:
October 14, 2007 at 11:43 am
Do you know how to keep a Baptist from cussing? Put two of them in the car.